bennyhillifier

You can see it
In the clouds up in the sky

Lard
Floats by in clusters
In our water supply

Lard
It's all of us, man
In our pores and in our hair

Lard's
What we conceal
With these corny clothes we wear

Lard is all
Lard is divine
Lard is control
Lard whips and chains our soul

Lard-We carry credit cards
Lard-We live in fear of art

Lard is the -OM
Lard is revolution
Lard is the tapeworm
In the bottle of cheap tequila
That comes alive at night
And sneaks up
And bites your nipple

Lard
Lard

Nowadays, most of us need someone
To run our personal life
Someone to see that
The plants are watered,
Someone to make sure the place is clean,
Someone to make sure dinner is waiting,
Someone to call for theatre tickets,
Someone to make up those cheap excuses

What we need is...

Lard-The answer
Lard-The dancer
Lard-The ointment
Lard-The dream
Absorb it
Inflame it
Respect it
Molest it
The country right now just wants to be
Soothed, and told it doesn't have to pay or
Sacrifice or learn
No one is over the hill
When the mountain comes to Mohammed

Lard
Lard
Lard

Lard-We love to eat
Lard-We love to pray
Lard-Mold over mind
Lard-Hooray!

Every time I take a crap
It's a cosmic experience

Religion and chemicals
Are the key to the future

Next time we have sex
Just pretend I'm Ed Meese

The weasels have it down, man
It's a whole new age

Lard

Which would you prefer-
A computer or a gun?

The sharks out lived the dinosaurs, you know

Pity the poor trainer
In the stable when the race horse farts

Poison oak really is
The aphrodisiac of the Gods

When people are asleep
We must all become alarm clocks

Hey, man
Life is my college

It's Dental Floss of the mind
Who will babysit the babysitters?

Ever hear about that guy in New York whose dick
Fell off in the bath after he shot it full of coke?

It's OK to run out of butter in Zambia
Just smear squashed caterpillars on your toast

Waiter, there's a terrorist in my soup
Which came first- Max Headroom or Gerald Ford?

Are you a man or are you a mouse?
If you love your fun- Die for it!

And feel
The Power of Lard
The Power of Lard
The Power of Lard
The Power of Lard

Avoid everything, etc...

I thought this said "LARP Appreciation Thread"

"Lightning bolt! Lightning bolt!"

hahahahahahaha

5 NORMAL, 5 NORMAL, 120 CRITICAL SLAY!

the power

of LARD



great stuff

Lard is good, in one of those green bubble-gum cigars kind of way.

Word to the wise: Putting "Time to Melt" on in your girlfriend's car on a long trip and physically restraining anyone from changing it until the song's over will result in her throwing the CD out of the window on Rt 95.

WHO WILL BABYSIT THE BABYSITTER?

I fucking love lard. Play them on RTTP and bought the lard tape from Taang! when it was in hardvard sq.

Did anyone get 'Pure Chewing Satisfaction'? It sounds more like Psalm 69-era Ministry but I dig it like a madman.

Way into it. A lesser-known gem.

I'm pretty much gay for anything Al Jourgenson does, though (and most stuff Jello does), so I'm probably not the best judge.

Ditto. The opening track to that album is so fucking fist-pumping.

I wanna be a drug sniffing dog ao I can snort coke all day long.